That's the sound of my son waking me up in the middle of the night because he can't sleep.
I can imagine reading parenting blogs where the response is "Awww honey do you want me to " do this that or the other thing.
My response as I was jolted from dreams was,
"What!?"
"Baba I can't sleep..."
"Well what the hell do you want me to do about it?"
"I don't know do you have any suggestions?" he said crying. You see his biggest fear is waking up without having had enough sleep. But for someone with such a fear, you would think he would not stall so much and make going to bed be like pulling teeth, I tried the whole story telling thing. But how can I really make you go upstairs for the purposes of going to sleep? I cannot really make you brush your teeth or take a shower either. I mean I could sort of... but that would be called abusive. So all I can really do is coax and explain and well....
I remind. The kid is in 4th grade. I was more annoyed by the tears.
"There is nothing I can do... if you can't sleep just lie there. Now both of us are awake."
So while I lay awake thinking about this instead of sleeping I realized something.... I had done the same thing as a kid. In fact, funny story I had woken up with my stomach hurting. It was cause I was hungry but I just didn't realize it. I thought it was some other problem. So my mother suggested sleepily that I put some milk on my stomach. So I literally did that, instead of drinking milk... which is what my mother meant. So that.. going back to bed, explaining, more wtf moments, taking a shower again... yeah. But I was much younger than 4th grade. I mean 4th grade your your own person. You think your like an adult.....
So then I realized also that when I was older I also couldn't fall asleep. So I would practice Kung Fu.
well more on that another time
What is Kung Fu and lion dance? Part self defense and fighting, part meditation and culture and part performance with drums and arts and crafts. Come and learn this art on Saturdays at 108 Stirling Road. Warren, NJ We work with Murray Hill Chinese School which also offers many other programs both cultural, academic and athletic. Check ou their website here https://www.mhcs-nj.org/
Kung Fu and Love
A great gift for Valentine's day or Chinese New Year
Wednesday, March 4, 2020
Monday, March 2, 2020
Clahk Doom Chahng
When I hear the drum beat, I want to hear that deep sound that fills the body. Hitting the side and coming out of your guts and your chest like a strike pushing the spirit of everyone on the street to to move together. Of course the modern stuff will still bring me running down a street I don't know just to watch a team I don't know do moves I don't know.
When I see the head move I want to see that deep hard stance that isn't just connected to the ground, but the body is connected to the stance and the head tight with the body with those hard lively fierce movements made for the look of those hard cheek bones of bamboo.
Like lightning striking right through to earth's core shocked by the clahk doom doom of the drum with the Cha and the Gong, playing not banging, coaxing out the metal crashing sound in music not noise.
But any moves and beats from masters or teens or children will make me come chasing for a look and pushing against strangers too. As long as the spirit is there.
When I see someone just talk about lion dance and they have that artistic feeling, that essence, without the head but in my imagination I can see their past performance from the street and from their eyes it makes me itch to pick up the drum sticks and play the accompanying beat like a possessed madman, or pick up the head and choi chiang like the same, with kei lun bo that starts and stops like wild sprints shocking children and adults into believe that the bamboo and paper might just have transformed into flesh and breath and blood.
But I will look forward to a workshop that I do by myself for children too.
When I see the head move I want to see that deep hard stance that isn't just connected to the ground, but the body is connected to the stance and the head tight with the body with those hard lively fierce movements made for the look of those hard cheek bones of bamboo.
Like lightning striking right through to earth's core shocked by the clahk doom doom of the drum with the Cha and the Gong, playing not banging, coaxing out the metal crashing sound in music not noise.
But any moves and beats from masters or teens or children will make me come chasing for a look and pushing against strangers too. As long as the spirit is there.
When I see someone just talk about lion dance and they have that artistic feeling, that essence, without the head but in my imagination I can see their past performance from the street and from their eyes it makes me itch to pick up the drum sticks and play the accompanying beat like a possessed madman, or pick up the head and choi chiang like the same, with kei lun bo that starts and stops like wild sprints shocking children and adults into believe that the bamboo and paper might just have transformed into flesh and breath and blood.
But I will look forward to a workshop that I do by myself for children too.
Thursday, February 20, 2020
Journaling
Well it has been a while since I wrote like this. A personal post broadcast to the world which very few people will read. It's a nice balance. I started writing with paper and pen again, but that isn't crazy, but seems somewhat reclusive and almost dangerous. Like if I am really able to write 'Whatever I want" and "Whatever I think"... that's dangerous. Weird how I kind of need "the public" which in the internet age is pretty close to my imaginary friend, in order to keep me somewhat balanced. I started writing again like this because I am going to force Noah to Journal at night, much the same way we were told to write during the school day at a summer camp at Red Oak in Boston. The teacher or counselor said that swear words had to be loops or that you could even just loop the whole page if you really didn't want to write anything. I was never at a loss for things to say when it came to words on paper, which is why Noah's difficulty with open response questions is foreign to me. I figure if we do the same exercise and he is able to talk with himself on paper through daily practice, then when he is given some assignment to write for school, he won't be so daunted by it.
But what about ME. Yes, I haven't been writing on the Boston Chinatown Blog at all and have been shirking blogging of any kind as well, because I felt there was nothing to write about... which, to get back tio Noah's assignment... is hypocritical. If I am going to force my son to ramble on the page... then I must ramble on the page as well. and After all, I started the journey to the Chinatown Blog by first writing personal stories about myself.
Although I haven't been doing much work on the blog since I moved to NJ I have been posting stuff to the Facebook page hear and there because its what I see other people doing and because I figure I cannot write in the same capacity, not being in the vicinity of the subject I am writing about.
And for a while, I felt like there was nothing to write about in NJ... or I wanted to save it until something more spectacular happened, and then I didn't want to share for other reasons, I almost said legal but that's not really true, I just began to turn inward, and it wasn't until recently, within the past few weeks in fact, that suddenly a path or purpose in NJ seemed to open up to me that had to do with everything I had been doing in Boston, whether it was the Chinatown Blog, Lion Dance, Community building, and writing.
But I hate to jinx things before they really get started and you will notice that somehow my writing has become less colorful and exciting. I feel it too, like I am going through the motions of a form trying to remember the next move instead of the moves flowing from me. And I hate that. But it is just one step in the process of allowing my thoughts to flow onto the page. And it isn't strange because I feel as if I were not writing these words, I would not be having these thoughts. That the stream of conscious exercise of typing and forming thoughts into words is a way of digging through my mind and organizing it. Now as my children come and talking to me I realize why I had stopped doing this exercise.... but I will try and continue you it, for a few minutes every night... starting on....Monday night for various reasons.
But what about ME. Yes, I haven't been writing on the Boston Chinatown Blog at all and have been shirking blogging of any kind as well, because I felt there was nothing to write about... which, to get back tio Noah's assignment... is hypocritical. If I am going to force my son to ramble on the page... then I must ramble on the page as well. and After all, I started the journey to the Chinatown Blog by first writing personal stories about myself.
Although I haven't been doing much work on the blog since I moved to NJ I have been posting stuff to the Facebook page hear and there because its what I see other people doing and because I figure I cannot write in the same capacity, not being in the vicinity of the subject I am writing about.
And for a while, I felt like there was nothing to write about in NJ... or I wanted to save it until something more spectacular happened, and then I didn't want to share for other reasons, I almost said legal but that's not really true, I just began to turn inward, and it wasn't until recently, within the past few weeks in fact, that suddenly a path or purpose in NJ seemed to open up to me that had to do with everything I had been doing in Boston, whether it was the Chinatown Blog, Lion Dance, Community building, and writing.
But I hate to jinx things before they really get started and you will notice that somehow my writing has become less colorful and exciting. I feel it too, like I am going through the motions of a form trying to remember the next move instead of the moves flowing from me. And I hate that. But it is just one step in the process of allowing my thoughts to flow onto the page. And it isn't strange because I feel as if I were not writing these words, I would not be having these thoughts. That the stream of conscious exercise of typing and forming thoughts into words is a way of digging through my mind and organizing it. Now as my children come and talking to me I realize why I had stopped doing this exercise.... but I will try and continue you it, for a few minutes every night... starting on....Monday night for various reasons.
Tuesday, November 5, 2019
Election Day
About to go to wait in line and vote
For those who will control this so small town
Even though the issues are not remote
I really have no clue quite who to vote for now.
The parties seem criss crossed and miss the point
because problems on roads are those more felt
when it comes time a leader to annoint
who cuts the trees and who scatters the snow melt
Does that have to do with any ideals?
Who would say they don't know how to rule
A simple town or that they have no feel
for local people, taxes and the schools
Now we push our levers hear's the test
Of how full the chosen one is of bs.
For those who will control this so small town
Even though the issues are not remote
I really have no clue quite who to vote for now.
The parties seem criss crossed and miss the point
because problems on roads are those more felt
when it comes time a leader to annoint
who cuts the trees and who scatters the snow melt
Does that have to do with any ideals?
Who would say they don't know how to rule
A simple town or that they have no feel
for local people, taxes and the schools
Now we push our levers hear's the test
Of how full the chosen one is of bs.
Monday, November 4, 2019
Fall Back
Setting back the clocks, the kids awoke,
later than they normally would have still
my mind is still a fog and if I spoke
I don't doubt that my words would slur and spill
The brisk fall air is something that I love
and I think more and more of my childhood
I have been watching more pbs shows above
the Netflix shows that I normally would.
The old Shows that I had watched in my youth
Its strange that suddenly I long
for those old past times that I would
Look for as a child with dreaming strong.
I long to paint and draw and run like Dai
Sillily without purpose or true meaning
Without a game of rules or goal to hide
the joy of random exertion and day dreaming.
And Suddenly I feel as if I know
That Something comes and something else must go.
later than they normally would have still
my mind is still a fog and if I spoke
I don't doubt that my words would slur and spill
The brisk fall air is something that I love
and I think more and more of my childhood
I have been watching more pbs shows above
the Netflix shows that I normally would.
The old Shows that I had watched in my youth
Its strange that suddenly I long
for those old past times that I would
Look for as a child with dreaming strong.
I long to paint and draw and run like Dai
Sillily without purpose or true meaning
Without a game of rules or goal to hide
the joy of random exertion and day dreaming.
And Suddenly I feel as if I know
That Something comes and something else must go.
Thursday, October 31, 2019
Halloween Fuss
6 in the morning and the oldest son is up. Sneak eating all the candy and other stuff, Turned out that Dai Dai the little one, can't find his mask for his Halloween run, It had been in the bucket that Shao is eating from, now we have to search frantically before the bus comes, Turns out we won't be trick or treating, Shao didn't hand in home work, too much candy eating. The weather will be terrible anyway, and the kids did get their time to play. Trunk or Treat and Halloween parties, It's a whole Halloween season not just one day. I can't believe we can't find this Njnjago/mask, after all we went through, Noah Says he didn't touch it, maybe it was me, I really don't want to do this see. The bus is coming, but I go running, Dai Dai forgot his party bag, this is such a dumb thing. I throw my umbrella down in the rain, sprint up the hill and get the bag just the same. Coming back down, the umbrella on the ground, the kids are looking at it not making a sound. Why would you stand there getting wet, when the answer to your problems is right there all set, to pick up and hold over you, what is going on? What planet are these kids coming from? I pick up the umbrella and we wait for the bus. Can't believe Halloween is such a fuss.
Wednesday, October 30, 2019
Chapter 2 Fau Yuk
Dolly awoke to see that the whole place had been cleaned up quite nicely. She had slept on the floor and there was a mat under neath her and a blanket on top which her guests must have found.
She looked to her right and noticed that Fung was sitting there in meditation position. She had never seen him actually come in.
"Where is everyone else?" Asked Dolly.
"They went on ahead to South Station to get tickets and save you a seat. We will be riding the Fung Wah down to NY Chinatown." Fung Said
"We Will?" Dolly looked outside noticing that it was not yet dawn. She did awake this early at times.... but it didn't mean she would then go out into the street anymore. She often went to the Garden. But in any case, she was up now and within a few moments walking down the street with Fung here towards South Station.
"Should I have brought my cane?" She asked.
"Nah just borrow mine." Fung said "Not that you need it."
"Nor you.... and if we are going to be walking around alot, I do need it sometimes. I have weak ankles."
"We Will?" Dolly looked outside noticing that it was not yet dawn. She did awake this early at times.... but it didn't mean she would then go out into the street anymore. She often went to the Garden. But in any case, she was up now and within a few moments walking down the street with Fung here towards South Station.
"Should I have brought my cane?" She asked.
"Nah just borrow mine." Fung said "Not that you need it."
"Nor you.... and if we are going to be walking around alot, I do need it sometimes. I have weak ankles."
"Doh La Doh La... there here. ok.. Yeah just keep going up, I'll come back around." Which K Lun did.
They gathered around and everyone was quiet because everyone in the group was tired. But soon came other old ladies who were not quiet and seemed quite used to being up this early, fussing over this and that and getting ready to go shopping in NY Chinatown and then come back to Boston within the same day.
The team was glad to see that Dolly was annoyed.. as they were and had no problem not asking questions and just waiting for the answers to come eventually.
They all filed into the bus. Sing had purchased everyone a ticket including Fung's They did take up most of the bus. One old lady complained that Dolly was getting on before her and that she would have to wait for the next bus. Lac made as if to back fist her and told her to go die somewhere else so as not to be a nuisance, which was not as shocking a thing to say to the crowd standing there as one would imagine.
Dolly suddenly realized that she hadn't brought any cash and she actually no longer had a credit card or anything of that sort.
Pretty soon after, The Bus pulled over
Stopping pretty randomly, people questioning the driver.
Fung Got out, nodding to the driver,
Over to a white motorcycle with no rider.
Boom on the white motorbike Fung took off,
He rode fast but smooth not like a young rough tough,
Dolly was excited as the bus pulled out,
she drifted off to sleep dreaming about
all the times in life that she regretted
Coming up against friends that were vetted
into enemies, that gunk that lingers
in your soul clogging up spiritual arteries
She drifted off leaving all of it behind.
Off into the sunset with this new crew in mind.
The trip was going pretty normal
Dolly just dozing
When suddenly there was freak storm and the roads were all frozen.
This wasn't even winter, when they left it wasn't cold.
Something crazy was happening
An alien invasion began to enfold
It wasn't really clear what was real and what was not.
All that Dolly knew was that the bus pulled over and stopped.
They had to walk pretty far
Through unkempt woods on the roadside
Everyone was going through and some said they should hide.
The Crew that Dolly rolled with didn't seem surprised.
Not even just not scared,
They didn't bat an eye.
It was as if they had known
Expecting all along
That this could and even would happen.
As if nothing at all was wrong.
Chaos ruled the world it seemed as things fell from the sky.
Could it be the world was ending?
Was the government a lie?
"It's not so much all that" K Lun expressed.
People will act as normal, when they realized this guys are guests.
In other words there WAS an alien invasion of sorts.
But not the world ending or world changing kind
The one that was real short.
As the crew talked amongst themselves Dolly realized
That they knew some of these aliens dropping from the skies.
They were coming to get something back then
And unlike in the movies
They could give a crap about regular people seeing them.
There had been some others of their kind
And other kinds as well
That lived on earth for centuries
And millenia to tell.
Except that for a few months
Stuff had hit the fan
And transportation was all done.
It was the end of days and the world was ending
Dolly didn't much care cause this had been life extending
Anything she had done she'd Risen amounted to a bonus
is how she considered it.
Hong Mao and Wu Nga started to fight
And they were walking through the dark in the woods toward a light. They weren't along rather it was a crowd of all kinds walking there.
The young ones wasn't worried about themselves but thought for some reason that if Dolly Fell they would be all screwed and what would tey do. Little did they know this was what Dolly was used to. She had travelled the world and hitch hiked the 3rd. Dove off a cliff in Iraq head first. This was nothing except for when she might twist her ankle but again since she had risen she had gotten stronger, practicing the Hakka knives longer than any young man would expect to train, So in the dark she was more dangerous than any of these other young bucks and gals who were heavier of foot than she, trust me.
Soon they came upon a group near a fire that was roasting human flesh
I'm not a liar. It's not that it was necessary for food more that these were the types that now could do this here in the woods. Or truly it was most likely not the first time. It's just that now in chaos it wasn't a crime. Like the whole country and the whole world had lost the mirage of the civilized.
I'm not a liar. It's not that it was necessary for food more that these were the types that now could do this here in the woods. Or truly it was most likely not the first time. It's just that now in chaos it wasn't a crime. Like the whole country and the whole world had lost the mirage of the civilized.
Like they were made of stone
Just saying that the world had only been attacked from space for a few hours and suddenly crazy stuff was all over the place.
It would amaze you but, people weren't surprised
Just scared
Realizing that they had to hide to survive
And that this would be the first of many trials that they would see.
Rock man A said to Rock B, "We keep eating these people even though were not hungry. Better pace ourselves and round a few up for later if you know what I mean."
Rockman C said to Rockman A, "You think this attack will last a few more days? How do you know things won't go back on track, all civilized and whack. Then we'll have to hide under ground again and just pick people off now and again. It's a free for all and maybe its time to rise up and take over."
Rockman C said to Rockman A, "You think this attack will last a few more days? How do you know things won't go back on track, all civilized and whack. Then we'll have to hide under ground again and just pick people off now and again. It's a free for all and maybe its time to rise up and take over."
Dolly thought savagely there and then, thinking if she could slit their throats and take all the things that they seemed to have amassed in just a short time, now sitting to rest and talk of future crimes. But again it was true they looked like stone, not humans made of flesh and bone, would a knife work? What would she do? She didn't think twice just started to move.
She ran over trying to cut all their throats. KLun and crew saw Dolly was no Joke.
But maybe a little bit crazy since, the knife cuts were making no difference.
Also its not like they knew who was roasted, on sticks to be eaten, the Stone men had boasted that they used to eat humans all the time, now they were eating more, sure its a crime, but this was not the place to start and play hero, there was too much they still had to go through.
In any case a stone man picker her up, and said, "What's this old lady trying to cut us up?"
They looked at each other and Dolly noticed, their eyes weren't stone, tim eto throw this knife, which she did, yelling out, "Get their eyes" Hong Mao and them swarmed all over the stone guys, soon the stone men were blinded on the ground, as the day dawned they stopped making sounds. It was clear that these were strange creatures of lore, that seemed to not be alive any motre. Was what Dolly did right? Or was it wrong? For now the crew took every thing they could carry along.
In the end, Dolly was praised, right or wrong, it might have been what saved them, cause what they took were many treasures,
Fung stepped out of the woods just then. and Dolly screamed "Where the hell have you been?
She ran over trying to cut all their throats. KLun and crew saw Dolly was no Joke.
But maybe a little bit crazy since, the knife cuts were making no difference.
Also its not like they knew who was roasted, on sticks to be eaten, the Stone men had boasted that they used to eat humans all the time, now they were eating more, sure its a crime, but this was not the place to start and play hero, there was too much they still had to go through.
In any case a stone man picker her up, and said, "What's this old lady trying to cut us up?"
They looked at each other and Dolly noticed, their eyes weren't stone, tim eto throw this knife, which she did, yelling out, "Get their eyes" Hong Mao and them swarmed all over the stone guys, soon the stone men were blinded on the ground, as the day dawned they stopped making sounds. It was clear that these were strange creatures of lore, that seemed to not be alive any motre. Was what Dolly did right? Or was it wrong? For now the crew took every thing they could carry along.
In the end, Dolly was praised, right or wrong, it might have been what saved them, cause what they took were many treasures,
Fung stepped out of the woods just then. and Dolly screamed "Where the hell have you been?
"Pack up the guns, pack up the knives, the food and the phones its time to hide." Just then there was a strange sound like bees, millions and billions, coming through the trees. People started screaming from further up. Looks like the stone people wasn't enough. Suddenly the whole world was full of the monsters from myths... but maybe this was a gift. Fung opened up a path in the ground. Had it already been there? or was it some kind of magic, that he cast just now. No time to argue, they all went down. Suddenly they were walking through a subway, and there was nothing really to say, they walked and walked, for quite some time. Knowing that they had escaped with their lives.
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