Baba! Teach Me Kung Fu!

Break of dawn. The morning has come.
My son opens his eyes and rools over.
"Baba!" he calls in a hushed but excited tone.
"Let's Fight!"

Bows opening and fighting stance prepared.
Kung Fu Soap opera moves carried out with stength (to the air)
and fluff to the person. At least in my case.

Hai! and Ha! and NGRRRAa!
"Quietly" I say, "It is still morning and early."
Indeed The younger one and Mommy are  still sleeping.

Enough is done. sets of 100s to warrant rest and heavy breathing.

And then the question.

"Baba how did you practice when you first started training for real?"


And I answered him.

It was a story, ajourney for me, as well as a physical summary of the class.

"First we meditated like this. For 20 minutes and then we breathed in and out. Then we stretched."
 and we stretched Father and son and did all that we had done when I was a beginner student from Calisthenics to Basic movements and bowing and breaks, though in less numbers and less time. As one does not need to rest for 10 minutes when one has not been really working out for that long. I told him of stories told and rituals done.

At the end were forms. And at first he simply wanted to watch. But then he did those too. And so it was a story of Kung Fu and a practice of Kung Fu. All before 8am.

"And then we would eat dinner." I said,"Because our classes were usually at night instead of early in the morning. And my son began to pretend to eat.
But why not really eat?

"Let's eat breakfast and pretend that it is dinner." he said

"Okay."

A wonderful way to start the morning.

October 1st Flag raising ceremony

Today we went to the celebrate friendly China U.S. relations at city hall and the founding of the PROC, which many Chinese Americans wish never happened, but it did and things are getting better and better as China becomes a world power and so if other Americans can celebrate it, I guess we should too. That being said, My grandfather was Kuomintang for sure, and my kids grandparents are Taiwanese, so we will definitely be going next week as well.
I went to help out team Wong Keurng, though I wasn't much use since I had the two kids, and enough people showed up that I wasn't really needed.
But it was good to show up just in case I was needed. My plan would have been to do tail while holding Jonah (because he kept running away.) Noah however was pretty behaved and played swords with the teenagers of the team. It was good to see friendly faces and chat about nothing of importance. I say it's good for Noah and Jonah to be involved with and part of as many teams as possible. It shows what a reagt social time you can have through lion dance. And more than anything we went to support Wong Keurng because they supported our team, that is to say, my Si Hing's team, and besides they are cool.

We just watched the lion dance (instead of performing, though Noah held is baby head and danced next to the drum) and it was fun to show our support for this team and also entertaining to see real lion dance. (as opposed to lion dance with cardboard masks that I do every week.) Maybe you think my kids see enough lion dance. But how often to I get to just watch and enjoy as a spectator? Not often. They heads and the drumming were powerful and it really brought the whole ceremony together. Before the lion dance the music Chinese Piano music piping in the background was very China. As in it brought you right back to the actual place. Specifically some sort of hotel or something like that. The music was very.. I want to say 1920's but back then  the PROC didn't exist. But it gave you that feel of being in some sort of parallel universe. Especially since we were in City Hall.

After we saw the lion dance we left early (because Noah wanted to) and we got pizza and fruit from Haymarket which we ate on the way back to Stony Brook. Next week I will probably just bring Noah again, like last year, and we will stay longer. The show is better and after all we will be really celebrating the ideals of both flags. Whereas today, many Chinese Americans, were really representing the American side of China U.S. relations and our friendship with the country and especially are friendships and relationships with people who are from that country, as opposed to cheering for it as our own country or ideals. Most bystanders at such ceremonies will see Asian faces and a Chinese flag and not realize some at the ceremony might even feel conflicted about being there. Because the White or Black Americans will think such a ceremony to be a fun cultural event.

I could hear many people saying in Chinese, "No, no I want an American flag." Jonah and I were given the China flags. When you are white, you can get away with it.
I saw a white guy dressed with a Chinese fishing hat and white Chinese outfit. "That's me." I told myself.
But really I should not feel any conflict at all. Especially if America doesn't.

 Of course there were a lot of people there who came to the U.S. straight from PROC and don't see any conflict whatsoever. They are proud of the flag they were born under, and proud of the flag they are not living under. And I suppose I wanted to celebrate for my friends among them as well. After all, all our little playmates at the playground in Brookline are from the mainland? And don;t I enjoy learning from them and studying the new chess games I hadn't seen before which are actually enacting PLA battles? And isn't our own government often questionable in their actions? And yet these actions do not make us love our country less. What is a flag? China is China, and America is America. let's celebrate together. That being said, next week we will probably celebrate harder. With cheers and screaming and Kuomintang flag waving.

Double class.

Today I taught two classes back to back at Noah's after school program Jonah was not to happy about it, because I guess he fell asleep when he spent time away form me and therefore was awoken in an uncomfortable state. He may end up staying with me next time. But I must say I ended up being high off endorphins or something. Or perhaps it was the success of the group, or the fact that the kids all liked the class. Nobody has been able to really learn my simple lion head combo. But whatever, they have a year to learn it. I think they will be able to pick it up by then right? And at any rate, they are having fun with Kung Fu. I was surprised out how different the two classes were. I couldn't really say one was better than they other or more well behaved than the other. If anything, the younger kids were better behaved. But the older kids could better understand what was going on. A lot of the kids found it really funny how we were doing Kung Fu in a circle in a sort of dance and even questioned my Sifuness. After all, Sifu's don't teach like this. They teach in strict lines. (at least the Sifu's and Sensei's you see on tv. Unless they are with just one student or you are watching a Chinese language film.) I think they could believe that we were actually doing what we were doing, the way we were doing it. Now it got harder when I tried to make them perform on their own. But still I had fun and they had fun. I guess that's the most important.

Hiding

Dai Dai has taken to hiding from large machines like trains. The first one was a truck moving through the school playground. He ducked behind some wooden pillars and covered his face. He also wanted me to hide with him. This made it look like I was sort of some creepy guy just hanging out at the playground without a child so I did hide with him. I was reminded of the time during Chinese New Year, while eating at a Chinese Bakery, when the lion head came into the bakery. It was a black and white head and I thought it would eat us. I made my mother hide under the table with me. Well there is really no reason for my boys to be scared of lion heads. They have even taken naps under the tail in the living room. But I guess large machines are suddenly scary to my younger one. He even covered his face while the train arrived today. But when we were on it he didn't have a problem. Maybe it's just all pretend. But it seems real. I mean I have to really deal with his squirming in my arms violently. As for at the playground I usually go near him. When Shao got out they hid together and that was kind of cute.

Four Square

Over summer it was baseball. But now it is four square. The game that dominates Noah's mind. Four square is pretty Kung Fu when you think of it. You hit a ball and you never know where it's coming from. The thing is we play with this miniature soccer ball so it is sometimes hard for me too. I genuinely lose sometimes without even taking it easy. It was hard for Noah to learn how to lose at this game. But after one session with a ton of older kids, and seeing all of them (most of them) lose in stride, today when we played he readily admitted when he lost and it was okay. I suppose the only thing I don't like about four square as a sport is that there is no running involved. But baseball has recently become just batting as well. We get our running done through games of tag, laps, and Kung fu sprints.

The importance of Teaching

My Sifu was once talking to my student and mentioned that he would be better at Kung Fu if he had a few students of his own. That basically by having students you are forced to become better at Kung Fu and it makes you more of a master than if you simply practice on your own.

Often in legend and pop culture there is a moment in the Sifu disciple relationship where the student becomes the teacher. This is always a big moment after years or some sort of catastrophic event. But actually you can learn from your students right from the beginning. And if you spend all your time learning from your students while you are teaching them, you spend a lot of time learning and improving. No great student or person simply practicing by themselves can learn as fast as someone who is constantly learning from so many fresh perspectives. It is learning and adapting to all these minds that actually gives you that aura of a master. Probably more so than your actual skill (which is of course also important)

But that means that teaching cannot simply mean performing in front of 200 people and having them follow along. A video recording can do that. Just as they are watching you, you are watching them. What is easy for them to do? What isn't? When do they listen and why? When don't they and why?

But in a class structured where there isn't any talk back, the Master doesn't learn much from the student. It is those one on one encounters, questions, and outright talking out of turn that improves you.

Here are a couple quotes from children that have changed the direction of my teaching style and art significantly.

On basics, from a trouble maker
"He says it's Kung Fu but it's not real Kung Fu it's just kicking and punching."

On push hands, right before I am bout to explain how to do it, from a girl who is the "model student" type
"Wait can we just do it instead of learning how to do it?"

But these tidbits cannot compare to real conversations.

A while ago I started teaching and learning from this elderly woman in the park. I haven't seen her since Noah started school. But Mainly I was teaching her push hands. She says that she found my advice extremely helpful. But she would also have a lot to say about what she thought about this concept or that concept. Because she was talking more about concepts, and using her own language, instead of parroting things she heard or talking about specific moves, I actually found that I could take this information, ponder on it, and actually use it. I.e. I was learning from her! And I told her so.

Recently in practice I actually learned from something she said. It had to do with the tree leaves deflecting the wind. What is faster than the wind? Well more on that concept later.

She also talked about Pouring weight instead of shifting it. I found this good terminology too. After all. It's cool to say stuff in Chinese that rhymes and then translate it, and to talk about animals that you only see sometimes in the zoo. But it's nice to have stuff from everyday life in America to draw from as well when explaining something.

In my after school program class, I am learning more and more from those children by trashing my old curriculum. They are still following what I am doing, and we do a ton of basics. Except the basics are on in a circular fire dance. and so even though we are now dancing around a cafeteria, around the perimeter, we have plenty of space.

Also one girl came up to me crying because someone colored over her portion of the lion head (yes arts and crafts are part of my class) and the conversation I had with her was something I wouldn't even be able to have in my old classes. In the military style follow me form type classes, if you cried I would ignore you while a teachers helper comforted you. At most I would just ask you to sit this round out.There simply wasn't time for that.

But nobody is crying in the circle dance. (Well one kid but it had to do with sharing. Since we switch heads, that's easy enough.) Plus this coloring over my part made me realize how fundamental the making of the heads is to the spirit of what I am trying to do. Every child expresses themselves their own way, in the dance, and in decorating the head. But ultimately we come together as a group because the dance is a group dance, and many people work on the same head.

Also the heads that they started making themselves were pretty cool. I mean, we have a robot head.  That;s cool. I am excited and learning a lot. From my kids, from my students, from random people at the park.

Teaching is a very very important part of you Kung Fu.

Being Five

I recently asked Jonah what he wanted to be when he grew up. "Five" was his cute little response. This is most likely because Noah has just turned five recently. Noah was very excited about turning five and was very excited about his party and gifts which realy were very simple things. Pizza, cake, family (we just had the party in our house with the people in our house) and gifts. The gifts were simple too. There was a helicopter thing which we still haven't been able to work and a couple books, But the highlight was Frozen Easter egg kinder surprise chocolate eggs.
Grace is the best at picking gifts. But the key to the perfect gift is not so much in the gift itself.
It is in the prep work for that gift.

Basically these children have been watching Kinder surprise videos on you tube for the past six months or more. It has been a calming mechanism. Here you want to do something besides wrecking the house or place of business where we happen to be? Zone out in a corner watching these videos with the woman's voice as your mantra. The woman's hands open the eggs (you never see her face.) Basically, these kinder surprise videos have been their religion, and they have been devout monks or at least practitioners.
This is what they have moved onto. Last year it was all about RR Cherrypie.

Basically what I am saying is with the creation of youtube you can actually choose what the craze will be for your kids. That great Christmas gift? What the next THING is? You can decide what that GOTTA HAVE IT item is through the 6 months of prep work. If you wanted it to be a book you might have to make the videos yourself. But the brainwashing is what makes the kids want something. As far as what it is that they want, it could be anything. It could be a pet rock. That really happened.


Anyway when the party sort of died down (I imagine we will still do something this weekend too right?) Noah no longer wanted to be five. He wanted to be four again. I'm not sure if he just misses the party or if he actually has started to want to be younger, while Jonah wants to be older. Well I guess I can get them excited about my birthday instead. After all, just because it's my birthday doesn't mean that we can't gear the party toward them anyway right?

Playing the E string

Noah has started playing, actually playing the violin. Up until now everything had been simply holding the bow and the violin and various other exercises. The first week of playing the E string did not go so well. But yesterday he played the E string 10 times and when he was able to do it with a clear sound he was so excited that he squealed in delight along with us and sprinted in place as we clapped. So it was hard to do, and stressful at first but I'm glad that he can see that playing the violin can be fun. Eventually even more fun than angry birds, especially when he is actually able to play songs.

Drums and consciousness

Drums are usually thought of  as something that awakens you and gets your heart beating faster and makes you want to dance. This is true. Today me and Jonah were listening to a live performance of Brazilian drumming. Jonah danced all around on a sugar hi from ice cream. He loved it. But then later he fell asleep in  my arms. One might think, "How can he sleep with all this drumming?" But I think that actually the drums helped him sleep, the same way that a CD of various noises like a hair dryer and and a vacuum cleaner helps infants sleep.
Noah used to fall asleep all the time during Lion Dances performances, in the stroller, next to the drum. Of course if he had been sleeping or bored and suddenly heard these beats, the same drum would wake him up and make him very interested.
How is it that something that wakes you up can also put you to sleep?
Drums are very much like a heart beat and very much like the sound you probably hear in the womb as a fetus. And so you are attracted to it and it you want to move. But at the same time those deep sounding drums (not so much the rat-tat-tat) can lull you into a sleep or dream-like state.

In fact often during dancing of many types you may be doing both things at once. Maybe you are moving around and partying or your under a head, or in a bog carnival costume. But at the same time you may be zoning out in an altered state of consciousness that helps you to move around for such a long period of time without a break. Anyway, it's usually difficult to get Jonah to go down in his bed. But he didn't even wake up the whole trip home. It would have been nice if I had brought the stroller, but I managed without. And of course once we actually arrived home and I put him on a mattress, try as he might to roll over back into sleep, he was awake and there was nothing to do but get up and do awake activities.

Perhaps we should always do Brazilian drumming for lunch and then crash.

Waiting in Line

This weekend we went to see Peppa Pig at the Zoo. Jonah and I did not particularly want to take a picture with the person in the suit. Jonah immediately wanted to see, "a little Peppa Pig" and the truth is the mask is ingerently not Peppa Pig as Peppa is drawn in Picasso-like fashion with Peppa's snout in profile but the two eyes facing forward. But Noah wanted to wait and I didn't have the heart to just tell him what to do, until finally, after being cut off and told Peppa will be back in 30 minutes, Noah had to use the bathroom. We sort of made it and sort of didn't. Once we left the line and decided to live our own life the experience at the zoo was great. We saw real animals. Granted they did move some warthogs and zebras and ostriches to a place where you could wait for Peppa and watch the animals. And standing and watching animals is not worse then wandering the zoo. But to stand in line for that long if you didn't want too... why? We did it because everyone else was doing it. Noah is of that personality and me and Jonah aren't. However, that thinking has recently rubbed off on me. I thought back to my dreams before and my aspirations now. Now I really want a job, an income, a house of my own, things of my own, that sort of thing. These are the things I have really been thinking about. But when did I ever want these things in the past? I suppose I simply want them because other people want them. Because I see that others have them and are waiting in line for them. The truth is, deep down, I do not really want these things. What I want is what I already have. My two sons, my health, the life I have.

Peppa Pig's line was a little microcosm of this that woke me up to it. The zoo is way better than Peppa Pig in a suit. And all the adults know this. But we all tortured ourselves waiting in line because everyone else was doing it and because it was presented as something special that we needed to do.

Money was created to make life easier so that you could trade stuff that you needed or wanted more easily. There was stuff that you needed, and then there was art. Even the most beautiful art, the most expensive, is essentially arts and crafts. And the arts and crafts of your child are pretty much worth more than some jade carver from 10,000 years ago. Why? because I don't know that guy. He was skilled but who is he to me? Screw him. I want my kids drawing.

So we get jobs and we wait in line to get imaginary zeroes in our bank account. Why?

Okay, we need to eat, and we need a place to live. And then we need certain things for fun. But what is fun? Is it seeing Peppa Pig? Is that more fun than the other things that don't torture us with a line that are nearby and easily accessible?

Some people think that being innovative is essentially cutting in line. But really maybe it is as simple as getting out of it, or never getting in it, and simply finding something better, that is different.

Using the Playground to improve your Kung Fu

Have you ever watched those old Kung Fu movies that were really weak on plot and acting and seemed to spend most of the film and money on training sequences and then the fight scenes? Kill Bill tried to emulate these. Anyway, the student would spend 70% of their training playing with various work out equipment and rocks and waterfalls etc. Then 20% is chores like getting water buckets and other manual labor and then only 10% is forms or plain old basics.

As I followed Jonah around on the playground after dropping off Noah I was trying to get a little work out in. But I felt I had to follow Jonah around, not just leave him to his own devices. Part of it was just emotional as he wanted me to play with him. So the only way I could work out was to work with the playground. So I jumped from thing to other thing, stretched out on the rocks and my Kung Fu moves were shortened when I was underneath play structures. But if I kept working out like that all day, I would probably get pretty good at what I was doing, and indeed there is a lot of strength training and agility that I haven't been working on that would do me some good.

First class at Noah's After school

The first class went pretty well. I pretty much did the same thing I do at Little Panda with some adjustments. We only did one song, and I tried to show them how to move in a circle Kung Fu dance. Even though the kids were older than little panda it just took a little longer to get everything set because it was the first day of class, where as Little Panda Preschoolers pretty much know everything that is coming. Also, these kids seemed more focused for the basics. So instead of just doing ten each I did 30 each at first.

I don;t know there was definitely something different about this class though culturally. Animal moves did not come out as easily as they do with a group from Chinatown, or Roxbury. I think I have written about this before. Pretty much if you watch a lot of martial arts movies you will already know a tiger claw and do it like a real tiger claw. In fact you will be excited about being allowed to do a tiger claw and do it with enthusiasm. This class actually said all the Chinese words with enthusiasm. They did the stances with enthusiasm. But the animal moves confused them.

Chinese children will actually be somewhat embarrassed about shouting Chinese words. I have no idea why. But the animal moves are almost second nature. No, they are second nature. So I guess I forgot that they are not second nature to everyone.So anyway, some of those moves took more explanation. But they'll pick the moves up and become familiar with them with repetition.

Class Description

Creative Cheung Family Kung Fu (Cheung Fu) for Curley After school Program

Every class will be more or less the same throughout the year.

Warm Up:

Students will do a brief Meditation and Chi Gung exercise followed by stretching, stances, and some basic drills. These drills will include kicks from the ground and standing strikes. They will be presented as a work out.

Lion Dance movements:

Students will learn the beginning movements of a basic lion dance. They will also start to sing the beats of the lion dance. The lion dance has aspects that are choreographed but is also largely improvised within a set of traditional movements. For the end of the year performance they will follow a leader head and signals from the drum for cues to follow the basic parts of the dance. But the individual movements of each head will not necessarily be synchronized. Just as wild animals have coordinated movements, but do not necessarily synchronize their movements. Although many modern lion dance teams synchronize movements, I will be teaching from traditional village style lion dance style.

Kung Fu:

Wheels on the Kung Fu Bus song (Students will learn ten animal movements)

Circle Kung Fu dance: Students will learn to move in a circle together doing the ten animal movements into the circle and out. Like lion dance movements will be coordinated but not necessarily synchronized. The circle dance will be to the beat of the drum as well. Students will follow one leader and also take cues from the drummer.

Free style forms:

Students will take turns performing solo Kung Fu sequences that they spontaneously make up using the animal and other movements they have learned or created themselves. Some students will take to this more than others. No child will be forced to perform by themselves.

Memorized synchronized form (for older children)

I will teach a small segment of a form to older children who can memorize and perform it together.

Memorized synchronized basics.

These basic from the warm ups can also be performed to the drum. Students will follow a leader and cues from the drum.

Arts and crafts

As a cool down to each class students will begin to make a cardboard flat faced version of a lion head. They will continue to work on and fix up the same head throughout the year. Or make a new one if theirs somehow is broken or damaged through use. This will be the head that they perform with and take home with them.

Teachers note:

I have made the movements fairly simple so that anyone can pick up these movements upon seeing them once, and then practice them at home. With the exception of the free style forms, students progress not by doing more complicated and fancy movements, but by doing the same simple movements better, smoother, with more power, etc. Students can choose to express themselves more freely in the freestyle movements and so these forms may or may not become more complicated.

Schedule adjustment

I guess anytime the schedule is adjusted (especially with small children) it means everyone will end up being tired. One would think I would have more free time since I ma just watching one, instead of two, but that is not necessarily true. The first thing that went was my nice little morning work out at the brown playground. Me and Noah would do a Kung Fu lap, and sometimes Jonah too. I didn't think much of it. But I think I may have become slightly more out of shape than I was due to not having this. I could do an early morning workout at the school playground, but I have to get there earlier. Or I could just workout after Noah goes in to school. I 've been doing more pull ups, but since I am in a new place I don't feel comfortable doing my Kung Fu. Part of it is people might think I am crazy and call the police. The other part is I am not completely confident in Jonah's abilities on that playground.

Now normally I would be picking up Noah right now. But today is his first day in the after school program. He was already tired from regular school. Are we doing too much now? We'll see. Jonah still hasn't napped. In fact yesterday we ended up all going to bed at 7pm. Now that's early. And I went to sleep too. But Jonah is resisting nap and yet he is not ready to go without a nap yet.

Today was a run around day where we did Kung Fu Panda and library and all that. Somehow as other people are now taking care of Noah I find that I have less time to work out, read, and blog. So those advertisements for GRUB spot which seems to be some sort of writing class, seem more and more enticing. Okay Jonah is tearing the house apart so I better tend to that.

The second day of school

Last night we started our nightly routine later than usual but managed to still get in bed by 9pm. Noah woke up later than usual but we still managed to get to school early. Well now the sparkle and wonder of school has worn off and basically we know what it's about. Noah still likes it. But we haven't done baseball that's for sure. I asked if he wanted to go to the park yesterday and he tried to go to sleep on the steps of our house saying, "Baba I'm so tired we did so much work there." He liked it, but he is just not used to it. And I am not used to Jonah's new nap schedule. He ended up falling asleep in the stroller at 4:30pm I woke him up at 5:30pm basically I think Jonah will have to just stop taking naps, unless he is willing to go down at 12pm.

Well Noah will be starting after school soon as well and I will be working with the after school to teach Kung Fu, Lion Dance, and that sort of thing. Only my class will focus more on creativity, like making the lion head. We'll see that takes me. After I get all this straightened out then I'll talk to Hyde Square Task Force about when to start that class I was going to work on with them.

Well things are starting to get busy. No more lazing around at the playground all day long. But then it's getting colder so staying out for that long doesn't really make sense anyway. Jonah is more interested in Play dough right now than going outside. I guess we will just go out for an hour or so today then. Perhaps I don't need to bring such a large supply of water with me either, or snacks. We can just come home for that.

First Day of School

Grace came with us to drop Noah off for his first day of school. It felt more like a photo shoot than just a walk down the street. Noah was smartly dressed in his Curley uniform (thanks to Grace) and was pretty excited (probably also thanks to Grace.) We got there early. In fact I had wanted to get there an hour early and just let him play in the playground, just to get the kids out of the house. But Noah would have been dirty by the time school opened. Instead we stayed home and Jonah managed to destroy a crayon box a marker box and some other things.

I think Jonah was jealous of Noah and the fact that he is undergoing something that he is not. Well once Noah was dropped off me and Jonah went to the tot lot, because that's what he requested. I feel like this summer I have been playing more with Noah and leaving Jonah to his own devices in the sandbox. Today however, it felt like he clung to me more. Or was it that I was actually clinging to him because I have nothing else to do. In any case. It was all about Jonah regarding which playground to go to and when to eat lunch or what indoor toys we played with. But then the problem of the afternoon came. If he went down at around 12pm he could fit in a 2 hour nap before I pick up Noah. If he went down at 1pm he could fit in a one hour nap. Now it is almost 2 and he is not going down. If he does he will have to be rudely awakened. So what to do for 45 minutes?

The Lantern Festival

Saturday was August Moon or Harvest Moon or Mid Autummn. Noah and Jonah had gone to the August Moon celebration at Little Panda and performed in front of little children i.e. their peers, so I didn't feel the need to bring them to the Lantern festival on Sunday.
In fact I had been talking for some time about the fact that Chinatown should have a celebration during the actual date of Mid Autumn moon in addiction to the festival in August (not instead of). And maybe this festival exists because of a dispute between the certain people and groups in Chinatown, but the result in this case is a whole other party. So sometimes there is a benefit to a tiff. At least for tourists. Which I have sort of become.

I showed up to perform with the Federation not actually knowing what I was going to do. At first it almost seemed like I wasn't going to be doing anything, and I wished I had brought a camera or something so I could help out in that way. Then I realized I would be doing Kung Fu, because many of the kids in our group that do Kung Fu (many don't) no longer like performing. Been there done that I guess. Well if you don't love it, than I suppose you shouldn't be forced.

But then after Kung Fu ing (I felt like I wanted my drummer to play louder for me. She was a student of mine, but actually for Kung Fu drum she can still be considered new, and that drumming spirit is something that just needs to develop through experience so I didn't say anything. I just felt mildly ridiculous doing moves quietly on stage. Or maybe I really just wanted to play drum. But whatever right?)

Right, after was the dragon  dance, and as mostly white crane people went into the dragon and I went over to it and still there was not enough people, I realized that I would be doing dragon too. This was funny to me because the last time I tried dragon was First night when I sort of just went in as a guest under Wong Keung's Dragon, still for the Federation, and the time before that was Mohegun Sun, also for the Federation, but 10 years ago, the year of the golden Dragon.

I was the second guy from the head, and I had vaguely remembered a conversation with the head at the Kung Fu school where he said, "when we do it the head doesn't move, only the body swirls." and I had said, "That's weird because when we do it the head moves following the pearl and the body follows the head in a swirl." Well not a swirl but a "bai" like bowing side to side. I want to quickly ask for clarification on this conversation which had taken place more than a year ago but realized the drum had started and we were moving so there was no point. I followed the head but also made the body ripple more than the head was.

I knew too that this particular head was the biggest heaviest kind and so it was easier for the body to move more than the head. With limited space (even without limited space) moving that heavy head is difficult. A fact which I would soon find out again as someone switched me and told me to help switching the head.


Now I was Dragon Head.

I was laughing and excited in a way that I cannot remember being so excited since senior streak. Because somehow I was sort of not supposed to be doing what I was doing, and yet I was and everyone from audience to performer was just going with it. I wondered if Lion Dance would be even more fun if I had never actually touched a lion head, and just showed up on New Year's and was allowed to go int the head.

They had tricked out the Dragon head with aerosol cans to make it blow smoke and then there was a release of confetti poppers from the audience. As I stood to the side to rest I sort of got hit by one, so I ducked down and shouted "Shoot Up! UP!" in Chinese.

Anyway, I had my fun, without my kids, who went on a dinner date with Grace and were quite well behaved apparently BECAUSE I was not there.

Perhaps I should get some sort of weighted stick to work on Dragon heading as I can feel the work out I got in my muscles today. The storm made a mess of the end of the festival I heard. But it also gave me an excuse to stay out to play longer. All in all, a good time for me.

Kindergarten Visit

Today we went to visit Noah's classroom. I think Noah feels fine about the whole thing. He is going to play with toys, he knows quite a few kids from the neighborhood and the tot lot. But I was actually getting nervous. Also when filling out the paperwork I realized how much I rely on Grace not just on a lot of paperwork stuff, but even some of the questions regarding what our household is like. I don't feel like I could just answer it and turn it in without Grace looking at it first. But what if I were a single parent? Of course I would just have to fill it out and hand it in right there. What's the point of letting someone else look at it?

Interestingly if Grace were to fill something out without me looking at it, I would care less. So I guess in terms of filling things out, Grace is n charge. Actually I guess just in general Grace is in charge. I realized this as I was filling out the paperwork, and at the same time realized that if the school were to contact anyone for anything regarding mt son, of course it would be me. Because I would be in walking distance and Grace is working. So why would they contact Grace?

Anyway, Noah didn't even want to leave but I was like, "You'll be spending most of your waking hours in this room soon so I wouldn't worry too much about not staying here long enough right now."

Tomorrow there is another parents picnic type thing and then school starts for real on Monday. I'm still not sure whether I am looking forward to it. But then, Noah was beating Jonah for the couple hours we spent at the playground and Jonah was rioting either to get my attention or because he was tired or who knows what.

Well supposedly we should nap now, and then it is off to Chinatown to do an August Moon celebration at Little Panda.

Free Ballet Class

Yesterday Boston Ballet had an open house and a free trial class. So after I did my Kung fu Panda stuff, I satyed in Chiantown, walked to Back Bay, did Library, went to Clarendon street, ended up buying 99 cent Wendy's sandwiches, and then walked back in to do the class. There were two other boys in the class. My children were exceptionally well behaved compared to how they were at my Kung Fu class. (Actually Noah was pretty good during Kung Fu.) Also, my neurons kept firing as I saw how the class was run. How they didn't go over too much (although they said that this class was not a traditional Boston Ballet children's class) and how the instructor was really able to save energy. I thought with kids that small you had to keep the action intense. But it's not true.

When the running turned more obviously "ballet running" Noah stepped out and instinctively had an awkward "this is not for boys" type of feeling. (though the instructor was a man, albeit perhaps not necessarily straight.) Jonah however, took off and felt free and was really into it. I felt guilty when I got back home because I had had no intention of signing my kids up. (unless I could somehow barter ballet for Kung Fu) I just wanted to give them an experience. Of course I would want them to do ballet for social and flexibility reasons. (I remember to the summer camp through Boston Public Schools. It wasn't just fun. You get to meet a lot of girls.)

But Jonah really really liked it. I almost feel that were I not to give him this opportunity and support him in it from an early age, that I would be a bad parent. Noah is a sports guy.

Then Grace picked up the kids and I actually took the adults class, also free. In fact, I felt like I learned more in that hour than I had learned in my one or two years doing ballet as a child. Actually now that I think about it, it may have been three years. I stopped in 5th grade when I left the public school system and went into Nativity. I had just done ballet but it was just something to do. I never thought of it as something essential to me. Was that a mistake? It was there for free for me as a child if I stayed in the public school system. Perhaps I should have kept at it. I suppose I knew I wouldn't be that good at it. It wasn't Kung Fu. It didn't strike a chord in my soul. But still.

Anyway I started having all these memories of being at the barre and all that just being in that room. Had I been in that same room?

The adults class teacher was also a man. I was glad of that because there were no other males in the class and at first I thought people were eyeing me with suspicion. But then the woman next to me was quite talkative, with everyone and she really brought the whole group together with her social skills. I suppose people like that really are the glue of a good society.

Anyway, while ballet and Kung Fu are different, there actually are things you can learn from the one and bring to the other. In fact it was my practice of Wushu that gave me the balance and flexibility that probably got me in to the program through Boston Public Schools. And I noticed that my balance was not what it once was, and doing Ballet I began to see a lot of holes in my Kung Fu training  that I not only should have known about and examined more, but which were realistically able to be remedied at the playground or in the house while watching my kids. Of course there are reasons why my focus had shifted as I began to teach kids and as I began to focus more on the fighting aspect of a move. When teaching kids and being cute, I felt the need to make the moves obviously practical and deadly so as to distinguish what I was doing from a dance that did not have that sort of killer intent ingrained into it.

I got a free pass to go back one more time. I suppose I might just go back to ballet one day. When I have a high paying job, when I don't have to spend money on my kids. So basically, when I am an old man. Ha!

Well I will go back for the free class. And maybe I will talk to some of the Chinese Folk dancers I know and see if somehow I can barter Kung Fu for dance with Them. And that will be a good place for Jonah (and even Noah) to start.

Caretaker

I suppose people do grow up. Looking on Facebook I see a ton of people who are looking quite successful and have had such and such a job and must be making quite a bit of money.
In fact, I have come to think that growing up has less to do with how old you are and more to do with how much money you have or are making anyway.

I remember feeling restless as a teenager and wanting to go out and explore the world and have adventures. I suppose I was somewhat afraid of the unknown, but I was more excited by it. Now I am twice as old as that teenager. In my minds eye then, I would have been someone who worked in a big building and drove a nice car. Or maybe not. As I soon came to not want to be part of that. But somehow I would have experienced life more or had more understanding of it. I wouldn't necessarily have secrets. But I would have perhaps been on my way to be something.

I am feeling restless again. Occasionally I will get excited by some sense of direction. An idea that perhaps I could be a teacher after all, or do this job in the community after all. But then, what about Jonah? He is not in school yet. When did I become so tied down to invisible barriers? Theoretically I have a degree I have experience, I have more things than I had when I was 15. Why do I feel more inhibited by the world than I did when I was 15? Perhaps it is because for the time being I almost feel as if I am the age of my children. Which means I am only 5 and only 3. And anything I do can only be through the eyes of a three year old or a five year old. It is almost as if putting them down, dropping both of them off, would almost make me, as I am now, cease to exist. And there is fear and trepidation in that. If I am not their caretaker, then who am I?

Tricycle Safari

Today we did the zoo with tricycles. The kids had fun and it felt like they were one their own little Safari. Whenever I go to the Zoo or a museum or something like that, I always think that even if I were really rich, probably I would spend my money mostly on memberships to these types of places. Their awesome. They are like entertainment and a gym all wrapped up into one. For instance if you are Rockefeller and you buy all this land and then you pay people to maintain it and pay taxes on it. But you go to the zoo, you have all this plot of land with cool animals, and since you don't own it, keeping it maintained is someone else's problem. Why go clubbing when you can go to the zoo? Why did I never think to go their before I had kids?

The Tigers got really excited when they saw the kids tricycles. Well the orange one did anyway. It (I forget which gender they are) started pacing and seemed like it wanted to jump over. That is a lot of activity for such a hot day. The lion was just sleeping there. The tiger looked a lot bigger then I remember. Again, this tiger used to be privately owned. Probably illegally. They say a ton of people own tigers in the States illegally. Seriously. Why would you really want that. Just visit the one at the zoo or put money toward the one at the zoo or go visit sanctuaries. Where does one keep a tiger? How do you pay for it's food? You probably have to hire people to keep it and all this is illegal. Make life easier for yourself.


Anyway the kids spent much more time in the playground than anywhere else. They can both navigate the playground and the observatory where you can look at zebras fairly safely by themselves. I still went up there with them and I heard mothers freaking out about their much bigger kids going up. But I could see that my kids were fine. But then those mothers were staying down on the ground and so from that perspective it probably looked more dangerous.

I actually only flip out when my kids really put themselves in a really dangerous situation. But if they seem to be fine or look like they won't get too hurt, I will let it play out. However, if my son were to walk in the back of an off limits kitchen area. I will tell them to stop, and then proceed to yell if they don't listen. If people look at me so what? What's more important their bodies or some sort of "social embarrassment." So if those mothers feel like yelling go ahead. That's their call not mine. I think they were more worried that they would not be able to go up and get them down if the child somehow felt safe going up, but scared coming down, like how a cat gets stuck in a tree.

When we were leaving, Noah flipped out that we didn't see the gorillas. But we can see them next time. He wasn't having it.